fish tale

Once I caught a fish alive,
she had to live, she couldn't die.
She jumped back in the river fast,
she smiled at me as she swam past.

first wheat

The great plant of western Canada is not the maple leaf even though it adorns the national flag. The great plant of western Canada is wheat. The golden sheaves swaying in the prairie wind conjures images of the open spaces and big skies of Saskatchewan and Alberta.

So this year my homage to the pioneers and settlers of the west was to grow some wheat in my garden. A friend got some wheat grain from his farming father in Saskatchewan because I found no where that just sold wheat grain to the general public. I turned the soil and then create a shallow drill into which I popped the grain. I the turned the soil over and that was that.

I was late in planting my grain (June 11th) so I knew I would be harvesting late. We have had a wet summer so although the wheat shot up it remained green for most of the summer. Occasionally I would take a kernel of wheat and check to see how it was drying up, other than that I did nothing. We have already had our first frost but wheat can survive that.

Last weekend I harvested the wheat, the next challenge will be to separate the wheat from the chaff.

heart broken heart mended

Last week my father underwent heart surgery to have a triple by-pass and a valve replaced. The operation took place in Dublin, Ireland meanwhile I was in Calgary, Canada 6609 kilometers (4107 miles) away. Such is the life of an emigrant, such is the life of an emigrant's father.

I have become accustomed to the feelings of uselessness and to the sense that in some respect I have abandoned my family. I have become accustomed to experiencing major family events by proxy through the telephone, internet or photos. I have become accustomed to these things but I am not happy about it.

My father is doing well and when I talked to him I was struck by his thankfulness, optimism and peacefulness. I am still learning from him.

Something inside me made me leave my hometown and my home country. I have created a life and a family away from there but it has come at a cost for me and my family.

Would I want my child to do the same?

koans and ergos

A koan is a statement contemplated by zen practitioners in the hope of enlightenment. Usually questioning and open-ended by nature, koans defy rational enquiry but may awaken other aspects of the mind. It would be misleading to regard them as puzzles as koans have no fixed answer.

A famous/infamous koan is "two hands clap and there is a sound; what is the sound of one hand?" A rational contemplation may suggest an answer (silence) but for other philosophical interpretations see here.

To my western mind koans seem frustrating because the question is framed within a rational context and yet the intent (enlightenment) can not be achieved by responding in the same context. Undoubtedly there is much I am missing when it comes to koans. Om.

Rational contemplation is something I can grasp and to focus this I suggest thinking on a phrase. This phrase is not a question but an answer for which someone can contemplate the question. It too has no fixed response but unlike a koan it may be subject to rational contemplation. Consideration of such a phrase may result in enlightenment but of an earthly kind. In homage to Descartes I will call this kind of phrase an 'ergo' which is Latin for 'therefore' and forms part of his cogito ergo sum statement.

Contemplate what question this ergo is the answer for?

"Life is brief but offers a few sublime moments."

first snow

Today October 3rd, in Calgary, we have just had our first fall of snow. Officially it is still fall as winter, in North America, officially begins with the winter solstice on December 21st. This contrasts with the United Kingdom and Ireland where it begins on November 1st (all hallows or samhain) and the solstice marks mid-winter.

Either way for me, the first snow in Canada reminds us to enjoy the remaining days of fall. As a small aside, fall was a term used in England during Elizabethan times and was transferred to the colonies where it remained in usage. Back in England it fell out of usage and autumn became the preferred name for this transitional season.

No spring, nor summer beauty hath such grace
As I have seen in one autumnal face - John Donne